A Note For My Single Friends On Valentine’s Day

A special note from the She Is Free blog…

We probably seem like the worst people in the world to you, I know. The ones who post all sorts of lovey dovey status updates on Valentine’s Day about our husbands and boyfriends and how perfect they are for us, and God brought us together, and yada yada, bla bla bla. It’s probably enough to make you want to smother us all in our sleep. (It’s okay, your secret’s safe with me.)

But beneath all that lovey dovey stuff, here’s what’s really at the heart of our posts.

Thankfulness for us. Hope for you.

Let me explain. You see, I’ve kissed a lot of frogs. In my wayward days I dated boys who I thought
wanted love, but really just wanted something else.  I’ve dated guys who I thought had my back but I’d find out later it was just all about them. I’ve been cheated on. I’ve dated guys with addictions to strip clubs (unbeknownst to me at the time) and guys who only used me for my money and what I could buy for them like I was their sugar mama. Some of those dates were just dates, and we barely ended the night with a kiss. TWICE I thought the guy I was with was marriage material and I had our ceremony planned out in my head. I could go on and on about the guys I picked for MYSELF but I won’t. Instead, I want to tell you about the one God picked FOR me.

You see, the one who was picked FOR me is the one who told me any guy I dated before him didn’t matter. He is the one I found when I stopped looking. He is the one who makes me laugh. He is the one who sacrifices things for himself when there are things I want not just things I need. He is the one who kisses all the grown up boo-boos and asks me if I want him to go beat up the bully who’s being mean to me at work. (Of course I nod and say yes, and he says okay, and we leave it at that.) He is the one who makes bad decisions with me, and then sticks by me as we fix it together. The one who disassembled the column in the front of our house so we could rescue the morning dove that fell into that same column one morning. He is the one who paints the master bedroom purple even though he probably would rather have boring old beige and swears that he can’t tell if I’ve gained a pound… or twenty.

He is the one who sneaks up behind me in the kitchen to kiss my neck, or hugs me in front of the kids, or boots the kids off the couch so we can snuggle together. He is the one who reminds me to mail the rent check, and who packs my car for home parties, and who homeschools our kids, and who rolls his eyes at me when I ask him to reach something on a higher shelf even though a step stool is probably not too far away, but then he gets it anyway. He’s the one who weathers my Type A personality like a trooper when I tell him I have to stay up and write one or two more pages for my next manuscript even though I’ve worked all day and cooked supper and put the kids in bed and followed up with our travel clients. And he’s the one who rescues me at 2 am when I’ve fallen asleep in the chaise with the laptop open and only a single sentence toward that two-page goal. He is the one who tolerates my need to drop everything and drive two hours to meet a friend for a much-needed girls’ weekend, and he is the one who would rather be nowhere else but beside me on a ride at Disney World.

Am I thankful for this man? Yes, I sure am. My testimony of God’s love and grace wouldn’t be complete without him. It is God’s grace that forgave all my bad choices when I wasn’t following Him. God’s grace would wipe the slate clean of the frogs I’d tried to kiss and give me a handsome prince who loves me unconditionally. God’s grace that would know exactly what I need as a woman, mother, wife, author, breadwinner. His grace would give me that man, husband, and father for my children who not only makes our whole world turn around, and makes us a great couple and family, but also makes ME a better person on my own. When I post about my valentine and how good he is to me, it’s not to be boastful or to make you feel bad for what you don’t have. It’s because I know and appreciate what I have now, thanks to what I didn’t have then. 

It’s also a post of hope. Maybe you kissed a frog. Or two. Or a hundred. Maybe you’re with a frog currently. Maybe you wish you could kiss a frog to end the loneliness you feel on holidays like today. Have faith – God is planning a perfect meeting for you.

In the meantime, don’t settle for anything less than God’s man for you. Don’t settle for the cheater, or the liar, the disrespecter or the one who wants to take all your money. Know that God does have the right man out there for you, and you are exactly what he has been praying for too.

Be free… to rest in the knowledge that God DOES have the perfect one waiting for you, and he WILL be worth the wait.



photo credit: Miriam Cardoso de Souza via photopin cc

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